Chapter Fourteen

Finding the goddamn kite was like looking for a needle in a haystack. Worse, it was a spooky task too.

Before us was a big wretched garden with run-down pavilions and a roofless hall. At the rear where concubines of the emperors once occupied the harem, its filthy high walls and dark closed-in alleys were spending out ominous vibes. Twisted, bony trees with spindly branches swayed and groped in the air, their barks diseased with a forging moss. Doors creaked and window shutters rattled on the outside. But once we entered, there was silence, the movement among the branches halted; we had a disturbing feeling that we were being watched with disdain, even animosity.

"Oh, you and your 'kite seekers' nonsense!" grumbled Suet-foong, glancing back over her shoulders as though she was expecting an unwelcome guest.

"Hey, if it wasn't for my brilliant idea, you wouldn't have met the emperor face-to-face," I defended.

"Gosh, my hubby, my hero," she deadpanned.

My last sighting of the kite was in the northerly direction, so we picked a way among the ruins, carefully avoiding the many broken furniture, planks, rodent feces, and other debris on the ground, and headed there. Soon we came to a ramshackle palace; above its entrance the name inscribed on the plaque dripping with spider webs told us it was the Palace of Admirable Benevolence.

"They should rename it the Palace of Abominable Malevolence," quipped my wife, waxing rhymes.

"Why?"

"When I was young, the elders used to tell me stories about the many concubines, each vying with the other for the affection of the last Ming emperor in this Palace," she elaborated. "The contention was so fierce that they would resort to bloodshed to get rid of their rivals - they really hated each other's guts. As a result, many concubines died tragically here."

I swore I heard a faint shriek of a female.

Without wasting any more time, we looked high and low for the emperor's plaything. The air was getting cold, and an icy wind began to blow, hissing over the snowy ground. Our breath was smoking; we were chilled to the bone. Ten minutes, twenty minutes, there was still no sight of the blasted kite. On the other hand, engulfed by the mist, we suddenly had an illusion of the dead following us! Shivering in fear, I started praying to all the gods, even demons, to save our asses. Well, someone did answer my prayers; the next instant, about twenty paces away from us, we found the triangular-shaped paper toy dangling on the lower branch of a tree. Praise the Lord!

I was tall enough to bring it down, thus saving us the trouble to look for a ladder. Then with Suet-foong grasping the kite by its thin wooden frame, we bolted back to the gate and as soon as we were in the clear, I shut the doors behind us. We were panting like a spent hound.

Surrounded by his entourage, Pu Yi was waiting in front of the northern gate. His face filled with anxiety, he kept biting his fingernails while being carried in a chair by four eunuchs. When he saw Suet-foong holding his precious kite, his expression changed; he began to grin from ear to ear. We hurriedly went over and knelt before him.

"Your kite, Your Majesty," said Suet-foong, passing the toy to Chang Chien-ho who gave it to his master with outstretched arms.

"Your Majesty will be pleased to know that there is no damage to the kite," I added. "It's as good as new."

"Excellent! Excellent!" replied the boy emperor, patting his plaything lovingly as if it were a puppy. "And what are your names?"

"I'm called Snow Phoenix," answered my wife.

Not to be outdone, I said, "And I am Fighting Dragon."

I expected the emperor to be in awe of our lofty mythical names. To my disappointment, he was not. Damn, he was one cool cat.

"Snow Phoenix and Fighting Dragon, for your courageous act in retrieving my kite, both of you shall be rewarded," said the Son of Heaven in a commanding tone. "Do you like me to grant you a title?"

"We're not title-crazy people, Your Majesty," replied Suet-foong. "However, it would be a great honor for us to shake your hand."

Pu Yi was caught unawares by her simplistic request. Frankly, so was I. Having the title of "Duke" before my name has always been one of my ultimate dreams; it sounds much better than "Master", don't you agree? But since Suet-foong had spoken before I could open my mouth, I decided to stand by her like a good husband always would, even if it meant banging my head against the wall tonight for letting this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity slip by.

"Very well then," said the emperor. He got down from the chair and extended his hand to Suet-foong who gleefully shook it. Then to her pleasant surprise, he kissed her cheeks. "Consider this a bonus," he said with a playful wink.

Snow Phoenix was over the moon.

He came to my side and shook mine. We looked at each other. Just before he blew a raspberry at me, he said, "I'm not kissing you."

I stand corrected: he was one cool, cheeky cat.

And with that, we parted. The Lord of Ten Thousand Years, happy as a lark now, returned to his seat and was promptly carried away, eventually vanishing into the thick mist that slowly crept through the Palace of Heavenly Purity. The day was waning. After shouldering my knapsack, I glanced at my watch: it was half past two.

"We still have another two hours or so of sunlight left," I said. "If we hurry, we can be back at the house before sunset."

"Good idea, I don't fancy socializing with the ghosts here," she gagged before abruptly running off. "Race you to the Outer Meridian Court - the loser buys dinner."

"Hey, not fair! You had a head start!" I cried out as I lagged far behind her. Holy torpedo, she certainly had light and nimble feet!

"Are you scared of losing to me?" she shouted back.

"I never lose!"

"I've got news for you: there is always the first time for everything!"

In the end I let her win but of course; I intentionally pull back whenever I was a few paces away from her. I do not know why I did that. Could it be because I am a sweet-loving son-of-a-gun? Whatever the reason, I felt it was more important that we, especially her, enjoyed the moments, puffing and laughing all the way - it revived pleasant memories of that wonderful day in Hangzhou when we ran on the shoreline of the West Lake.

After a short rest, we headed for the stable. Suet-foong was suddenly quiet. I found that quite unusual for she was always a chatterbox, more so, with her victory over me. Furthermore, she seemed to be dragging her feet.

Finally, when we were about to mount our horses, she asked, "Hey, Ake, how strong are you?"

"Strong enough to carry a buffalo," I replied, flexing my biceps.

"Yeah, that's what I figured."

"Why? Are you tired?"

"No ... actually I am in pain," she groaned.

Instantaneously I bore her in my arms. "Your leg cramps bothering you again?"

"Worse, my whole back feels like it has been cut by a thousand hot knives. I think you'd better take me to the doctor."

Luckily, the kind, elderly stable owner who had witnessed the whole incident, helped me to wave down a rickshaw. He then instructed the driver to quickly take us to Beijing General Hospital which was about three miles away.

During those few anxious moments in the rickshaw, my mind was in a flurry. I looked at my darling wife, her face all screwed up in agony. She was cuddling against me. I kissed her forehead; oh, God, what was happening to her?

"Hey, driver, can you go a little faster, please?" I asked the young coolie. "My wife is in great pain."

"I'm doing my best, sir," he answered.

"Your best is not good enough. Tell you what. I'll triple your fare if you can be at the hospital in five minutes."

He took off like a bat out of hell.

When we finally reached our destination - the driver made it in four minutes flat - Suet-foong was immediately wheeled to the emergency ward on a stretcher. I was told to go to the waiting room located nearby. There, I saw a few other visitors sitting on the bench, and just like me, they were on pins and needles. The depressing white naked walls and the chilly environment did little to steady my nerves. Besides, the strong antiseptic smell that clung to my nose hairs reeked of illness and mortality; I hated this place.

As the clock ticked away, I sat idly looking at the concrete floor punctuated with short walks to the reception counter and back, focusing on nothing at all; my mind was a complete blank. People came. A few left. Many stayed. There was a constant drone of voices about me; whispered words and tears in one corner, happy conversation in another. As I waited and waited, the world outside went on as usual ... it sure felt queer.

At long last, after what seemed to be an eternity, I saw Suet-foong entering the waiting room; she was all right! I was elated. I rushed over and gave her a bear hug.

"Hey, go easy on the hug, Ake!" said my wife. "Any tighter and I would have to return to the ward with broken ribs!"

"Oh, sorry," I apologized, quickly loosening my grip. "It's just that ..."

She put her hand on my lips to cut me off. "I know; you're forgiven." Then she kissed me.

"I've given her an injection to alleviate her pain," said a male voice.

I was so caught up with the hugging and the kissing that I did not notice a doctor standing behind her. Bespectacled, lean, and in his fifties, he introduced himself as Dr. William Loh.

"So, what's wrong with my wife?" I asked as I shook his hand.

"That we intend to find out," he replied, flashing a smile, "but she needs to undergo a series of tests. For this to proceed, we require your consent."

The word "tests" sounded so obscene to me; it was as if he wanted Suet-foong to act as a guinea pig for a new vaccine or something. But there seemed to be no other options available for us. "Doc, there is no need to ask me, my wife's the boss," I said. "Whatever she wants she gets. And right now she wants her sickness licked. Get it?"

"Yes, I got it. There would be a fee involved of course. And it's quite on the high side. Think you can afford to pay the bill?"

"Money is not a problem," I said, raising my voice. Bloody hell, did I look like a frigging pauper to this man? My feathers were ruffled by his lack of tact. "Just give her your best attention, your best care, your best nurses, everything." I was behaving like a snob.

"You can be certain of that," he assured me, his smile never leaving his roundish face. "Please come back tomorrow morning at seven o'clock. We shall have all the necessary equipment and manpower ready for the procedure by then."

"Fine, we'll see you when we see you," said Suet-foong, making an attempt at humor.

"Right, and one more thing, Mrs. Akecheta: to obtain a more accurate diagnosis of your ailment, don't take your breakfast."

"Sure, doc, I'll eat only air."